This is HARD.

When we signed up for hosting, they talked about advocating. They said to make it about the child so people could get to know them, their personality, etc, something uncommon for most international adoptions. I think that's great and very helpful for potential adoptive families. But there is more to it than that. There is also the hosting aspect and since I get a lot of questions about hosting here is my take....

This is HARD! I'm not saying it isn't worth it, but it is fall on your exhausting. Part of that could be that I have daycare kids here so I have a lot of needs to meet, but even without that, this is hard. Kara is such a smart girl, she wants to have conversations all day, pulling out my phone every few minutes to translate is exhausting! Then if one of the other kids is too loud it interferes with the translator (as she's speaking into it) and we have to start over. I feel bad for shoving my phone in her face every time she wants to say something. And I feel terrible about this, but it's the ugly truth, sometimes when she tries to tell me something, I just nod my head yes, say "shi" and go about my business because in that moment I can't do anymore. Bobby came in at lunch time to take Siri to school, I don't know what pushed me over the edge, but I fell (gently, as not to hurt my old body) onto the floor face first and just cried for a minute-I probably threw my arms into the air dramatically on the way down. 😉

But here's the other truth....everyday we see more of Kara. Everyday she smiles more, today there was lots of laughter! She's helpful, she opens the door if she sees someone coming or going, she wipes little kids boogers for them. I was changing a diaper today and another baby was fussing, so she picked her up carried her around and talked to her. At lunch time I got out all the cups, turned around and she had already grabbed the milk out of the refrigerator for me. After watching me make eggs this morning she insisted on stirring mine, then proceeded to put them on my plate and salt them for me. She's starting to play with our kids more, tickling Raya, teasing Siri and having snowball fights with Audrey. She's so kind and thoughtful, in her small bag that she brought from China she had a lot of Chinese snacks, she shared one with each of the daycare kids, it was so sweet and they all felt so special.

After all that she's been thru in the last week (keep in mind she was told she was coming to America about one week before she left China, giving her little time to prepare or process what was about to happen) she's doing so well. A little exhaustion on my part is nothing -although I am hoping to upgrade from sleeping on the floor to my own bed soon. What we are doing now will change her life forever!

Pictures are the best part of a blog so here are a few from today.